When The Bottom Falls Out - 1

On Friday, May 15th, I received a phone call from my older brother, Gary, and was told that my Uncle Darrell had just died. I prayed and felt the Lord urge me to go up to Richmond, Va. to be with my mom. I strongly felt she was going to need me during this time. I got my car serviced the same day and left early Saturday morning for a 1000 mile trip in which I arrived mid day Sunday.

Darrell was only 61 years old. He was 3 years older than Gary and 8 years older than myself. He was more of a friend than an uncle. My Uncle was a simple man, but intelligent. He had a learning disability, but that didn’t stop him from loving life. He loved working with the dirt and making things grow. In many ways he was an artist with landscaping.

When I arrived in Virginia. my mom was surprised to see me. She was glad I was there, but said that it wasn’t necessary because she knew Darrell wasn’t in pain anymore. A lot of unhappy things have happened to Darrell over the years and many of the hurts were caused by my own family.

Almost a year ago, Darrell developed an open sore that eventually caused his foot to be amputated. What I didn’t know was that Darrell had given up. He stopped eating and drinking and willed himself to death. That was hard to handle. Darrell was one of the kindest men I ever knew.

I thought that I would only be up in the northeast for 2 weeks. One week for the funeral and the other to spend time with my parents. It didn’t work out that way. Circumstances arose that caused hurt feelings, jealousy, misunderstanding and to a sense: betrayal. Instead of grieving, remembering the good times and saying goodbye to Darrell, a tug of war situation occurred where I was stuck in the middle. I was literally on the phone from 1 to 4 hours a day trying to get things worked out and feelings mended. My mom has a bad heart and I was concerned the whole time for her.

My family has problems just like any other family. I feel as if I’m not as close to certain family members as I once was. I still love them and will honor them, but I don’t know if my relationships with them can ever go back to what they once were. My heart’s breaking over that as well.

Stress was the beginning, middle and end of my day. It surrounded my like a cloud. I was only able to grab 8 hours one day to visit 2 of my many friends that live in the DC area. Every time I tried to get time alone, something valid would come up for me to take care of. By the time I left for home, I was emotionally, spiritually and physically bruised.

End of Part 1, part 2 tomorrow