When The Bottom Falls Out - 2

Part 2 from yesterday’s post

A few days after I arrived home I found out that no one had called my husband or reached out to him in any way while I was gone. No one contacted me in any way either. I know people knew because I put the situation on the prayer chain several times during the month.

I was gone for a month and that would be hard on any family member. The church (on a whole) is losing it’s compassion and is falling rapidly into only caring about the people that are in their own circles. I’ve tried not to notice how many people have slipped away simply because no one has noticed. I am now. I’ve had a taste of it for myself. We’re supposed to be family. If one laughs, everyone laughs, if one cries, we all cry. Our church family wasn’t there for us. I wonder if Barry and I didn’t show up, would anyone even notice? Would they care?

I feel as if the foundation stone that supported my beliefs in my family and church family has crumbled.. How do I handle my world falling apart in a month’s time. I feel as if I have a gaping whole inside of my chest cavity that is actually a physical ache. My soul is devastated and my spirit is crushed.

I understand that the Lord works all things for good. I just can’t see it right now. It might be a while before I can. The one thing I’ve learned through all of this is that the Lord is the only constant you can count on. He will never leave nor forsake me. He will show me the way out of this wilderness and he will put my experiences to good use one day. I sincerely hope that one day I can look upon this month and laugh with the remembrances of the Lord’s healing ability. For right now though I can’t laugh, I can only cry.

I ask for your prayers. Not just for me but for all that were involved. My family members that don’t know the Lord will go to hell if something isn’t done. Even with all that has gone on, I don’t want that. I ask for myself also. Please pray that I can heal. I need to see the Lord’s will and what he wants me to do next. My spiritual eyes are blinded right now. The Lord heals the broken hearted, helps the blind to see and the lame to walk. I cry out for healing, justice and vindication. Lord please be my rock, shelter and shield.